The creek area at the back of my home community: Kincolith.
I know that I said that I'd post part two of the previous post- expounding on the life that I now live in, and feel- again, so vibrant and so alive: the greatest I've felt in the last seven years. It really does have a lot to do with the new church I'm attending and the many new friendships I've made and again, stability in my spiritual life and connection. This post in a way does tie into that as I'm going to reflect on an event we attended last night as a part of our church program. The flyer read: A Timely Invitation To A...Special Movie Event: "In Time". Yes the movie, titled, "In Time" was just that- as it depicted a futuristic society that used time as currency. The more time you had- the longer you lived. When your time expired, you "timed out," you died. Given this, you can begin to imagine the many scenarios that would make such a movie very interesting and worth seeing. In the words of the synopsis: "In a future where people stop aging at 25, but are engineered to live only one more year, having the means to buy your way out of the situation is a shot at immortal youth."
Echoed throughout the movie and in our discussion afterward, is the question: "How much time do we have?" The answer: "We have a day; but you can do a lot in a day." This really got me thinking as the two main characters always seemed to be fighting for time and literally, for their lives as their time came down to minutes and sometimes, seconds.
We were asked, "How would you live today- if all you had was today, the next twenty-four hours. What determines what you would do, or how you would live?"
Immediately I thought about the past seven years of my life in terms of the loss, death, sorrow, grief, and pain; and how death coming so quickly has put me in full remembrance of the importance of life, and living: it is a choice.
I thought in terms of the accumulation of years and the attaining of wisdom through experience, that how I live my life today is in direct correlation to how I lived my life yesterday. Those things that happened or didn't happen; those things that should have happened- but I let pass by. Those things I wanted to do but didn't do- or to say and didn't say. Today is another opportunity to make these things right.
If how you live today is in direct correlation to how you lived yesterday- and you are sensing a bit of a loss- did you "spend time" doing those things that you love doing the most- those things that make you the happiest. Did you "spend time" with the ones that you love the most, the ones that are the most important to you...and many are just a phone call, an email, or a text away. I'm recognizing in my personal journey that my today is in direct correlation to how I lived my yesterday: that how I choose to "spend my time" is a reflection and a motivation, of my loss of yesterday. How much I value and use my time today is directly related to my experiences of love, joy, loss, and pain. I've come to realize the obvious- to live is a choice- to be happy, is a choice. Sometimes when I'm feeling down I'll go for a walk and buy someone a coffee or lunch, and nine times out of ten it's a street person, a vagrant. It's just something I've always done, first, because I've had many great examples set before me of the effects of human kindness, and second, seeing the need of someone else before you is one of the greatest treasures of the human heart. It is the unselfish heart that brings life and light to an otherwise darkened world. It is the person that seemingly has nothing that gives the most. To give when you are on the border of "without" is to give out of sacrifice and love- it is the essence of true giving. My brother Fred was like this, giving even the shirt and coat off his back to people he knew that lived in the streets and slept under bridges- that searched in garbage cans for their next meal. Once he took of his shoes and gave it to a homeless friend of his. One of my nephews has a similar story. When a homeless person was admiring his new "Nike Airs" and wished he had a nice pair "like that," my nephew took off the runners and handed them to him, gently, and said, "Here. You can have these." This bears the answer to the question in great humility, in terms of "spending time": "Excuse me, do you have a minute?"
The essence of true giving stems from the experience of life lived. The one who truly gives is the one who has experienced great joy, heat-ache, and felt great pain...and through it all has learned to smile again- to be happy- in spite of loss.
How much do you, I , value today? When we sit back and examine our lives it should be in direct correlation to, and a step above, how we lived our yesterday. Make every moment count. The ability to see the beauty in everything and that everything and everyone has potential.
The ability to prepare things in love, patience, and humility, is the greatest nourishment to the soul.
To the ones who have helped me through what were some of the most difficult times of my life, "Thank you!" for "spending time" with me! To all my family, friends, and to the ones who have become a large part of my life in recent months: Thank you!
When you "spend the time" to bake cookies filled with love- to a heart that's been beaten, battered, and bruised (and in the process made stronger!), that love is easily felt. Sometimes you don't know how your acts of kindness are affecting the lives of others...beautifully!