This is a posting I placed on a social site some time back. It's just something I felt in my heart to write, to post. I received a few very passionate, heart-felt responses before it was flagged for removal. Women, searching for true love were deeply touched by the post's content: its honesty, depth, and sincerity. I guess for others it touched on too great a truth- that ultimately, there is the one out there who is our soul mate; the one who is ultimately made singularly for you, for me. In the direct or indirect acknowledging of this truth, or simple exposure to it, I feel, because it created feelings of discomfort, many choose to flag this post for its removal. Its removal does not negate the possible truth- that there is a "Soul Mate" out there for you, for me. Too many of us settle for the one that we think "Is the one," often giving up because of loneliness and not wanting to be alone, rather than letting life and love take its natural path- that would ultimately lead us to our one true love. In the same breath, maybe we do have to go through a few broken hearts and "lost love experiences" before we meet "the one." Also, the post touched on the concept of a "God," I do believe in God, I do believe in Jesus; I am not a man perfect by any means- but given the atrocities, challenges, and struggles of my life and the many, mountainous obstacles which I have had to over-come to get to where I am today...He's always been, and always will be: My best friend. I write this also having been through one failed marriage.
This post is based on a dream that I had one year after my separation. Today, three years and three months later, my ex and I continue to get along and are very, very good friends.
Posted: March 31, 2011 5:00 AM.
You're the most beautiful being that I've ever seen. When I seen you- I stood in awe: mesmerized, speechless...smitten: completely. I looked, I stared- my eyes could move in no other direction than to look deeply into those starlit eyes that shone with the sparkle of diamonds. The eloquence, beauty, and elegance of your stature totally enraptured my heart; my soul- the entire universe stood still, as a soft voice spoke gently into my being: "There she is..." My heart raced, rampant with passion. My spirit reeled; my soul danced. Excitement, happiness, and joy fail to describe fully all that I was feeling at that moment. I was elated, ecstatic, moved deeply with emotion as tears welled in my eyes and rolled gently down my face at the sight of you. First, because I thought that I would never find you- that we would never meet; and second, as each day ended and we still hadn't met, I had no idea how I would continue to carry the burden of the love that I had for you. It was becoming pain, heartache, and even torture. I had no idea who you were, where you were, or what you looked like. I had the image and the description that I often offered to the Father as I prayed. I knew that you were strong, spiritually, and beautiful- internally and externally. I had so much love to give, so much love to share. As long as we hadn't yet met, my day ended as it always had: alone, in the agony of another whispered prayer. Somehow, I always found the strength to believe- I refused to give up. Now, here you are: The warmth of the tears rolling gently down my face reign in blessing.
Suddenly, every tear cried in the secret place is given substance, depth, and meaning. Every prolonged, agonizing moment of waiting is given purpose. Every question answered, by- "Your Presence."
I tried almost desperately at times to make the dream come true; only to come to dead end streets, disappointments, and broken hearts. Finally I gave up the search and thought, "Maybe God doesn't need my help. He knows what's best for me and in His good time He'll send her to me. He'll cause our paths to cross. And when we see each other, we will know."
This God of mine has never failed me and does truly know what's best. If He gave me the dream, this desire, then in His appointed time it will come to fruition. In waiting for you, I had to believe this. This was my hope. After all, how much more symbolic can a dream become- than that, of a "Huge, fully blooming, Cherry Blossom Tree" on the beach of my reserve, in far northwestern, British Columbia, immediately below my sister's house. The tree, rooted and grounded deeply, where the water meets the shore. My sister and I on the boardwalk next to the tree, staring in complete awe, "How is this possible?" The blossoms: huge, beautiful, and of the loveliest pink. The leaves: the brightest, radiant green. The trunk: strong, and immovable. Under clear, blue skies, as the waves lightly rippled against the shore, splashing gently toward the tree. It was absolutely beautiful.
I knew your country; your nationality; your origin. I knew that once we met we would become one: rooted and grounded- passionate and beautiful. A love birthed under the clear blue skies of heaven and nourished by the elements of earth and water- these things, eternal. I knew, when I seen you, that you were mine. To do away with even the slightest shadow of doubt it was necessary for the voice to speak internally to confirm this- to know of a certainty, that ours would be a love to last a life time; and that daily our love would be renewed, unending, as the waves that ripple endlessly against the shore. With every passing second we'd fall hopelessly in love with each other- over and over again.
I thank God continuously for the Cherry Blossom Trees that line the many streets of Vancouver. When I look at them, I think how wonderfully blessed I am to have you. I smile, and whisper, reaffirming my love for you. You don't know this, but the moments that I am away from you- I tell you a million times that I love you; and that I miss you. How exciting it is to know that in a few short moments or hours I will be with you again- it makes everything that I do more enjoyable and fulfilling. Everything is given life, purpose, and meaning. My "Beautiful Cherry Blossom," I can hardly wait to see you again. I love you so much.
End of Post.
Two years later; I still wait, believing...in the prophetic and absolute possibility- that dreams do come true.
If you've found love; hang on to it- and fight for it when you need to. If you've found love, it's a beautiful thing- don't ever let it go. A very good lady friend of mine said, as I shared with her my desire for an Asian companion: "Godwin. Maybe you shouldn't limit yourself. You should keep yourself open and available for the possibility of love coming from any direction, and who knows, maybe she isn't Asian. You may have to go through another relationship or two before you find the right one." There's great truth in her words. And maybe, just maybe...
As I feel, I write, and experience- then internally, comes the poetry, comes the song; the passion, set aflame: lyrically.